Struggling today and need someone to talk too.

[Kitty93]

Hello,

I first want to say I have a doctors appointment in a few hours to help me medically get out of this crisis but before then I need to get myself sane.

I have been struggling more and more with my mental health the past few months, my Mum died in March suddenly and I think it is delayed grief and trauma. My worries are however

1. I finally phoned in sick to work today. They are aware of my situation and my boss said 'Helen, can I ask you ring me after the doctors appointment? I am worried about you'. Does she mean she wants to sack me? Get rid of me? I can't see why she is worried about ME...she never was before. I work for a big company so I guess they have obligations but still.
2. An unexpected bill has come out leaving me with just a few pounds for the next few days. This is fine, I don't need anything but it makes me feel vulnerable. I cannot believe I slipped up and forgot about the bill. I am not worried about the money but that I messed up, does that make sense?

I hope someone understands, I am such a mess :(

[Goldfinch]

Hi Kitty93, delayed grief sounds very likely. Maybe you needed to keep the lid on it at the time? I wouldn't think for a minute your boss wants to get rid of you - she sounds like a caring manager who wants to help an employee in difficulty. As for the unexpected bill, it happens to us all. Don't beat yourself up for not being 100% on the ball when you are feeling awful. Just tell the doctor everything and take it from there.

[Kitty93]

Thank you for your reply. It is easier just knowing that there is another 'human' on the other end of the monitor reading how I feel.

First time off for my mental health, and admittingly it does have a stigma. I am just hoping and praying my doctor is good one.
x

[Goldfinch]

Don't forget one in four people has a mental health issue at some point - that's a large part of any workforce! Let us know how you get on x

[Kitty93]

I've been signed off work for two weeks and put on anti depressants. Kind of glad I made the step to go drs x

[Croydonbee]

Take care of yourself, Kitty. You've been through a really difficult time.

[snowghost57]

Kitty, people understand about death more then you realize. I think your employer was being supportive. I too lost my mother suddenly, I was only at my job for 3 months. I just flipped. I couldn't believe my mom, my rock was gone. Grief is a process. I lost my brother last Christmas. I cried everywhere I went. You are reacting in a normal manner. I'm glad that you got help.

Stay strong! You will get through this!

[pulisa]

Grief is an awful thing, Kitty. I'm glad your GP and employer are understanding and sympathetic. It's very early days for you in the grieving process and I'm not surprised you are struggling. I hope the meds and breathing space from work give you a small amount of respite at this very challenging time for you.

[braindead]

I've been signed off work for two weeks and put on anti depressants. Kind of glad I made the step to go drs x

NOW starts your recovery