I was always an introverted shy kid and I got proper anxiety when i was around 18 (im 30 now). i managed to work through it using 'Claire Weekes' book and I was recovered. The only real times I had anxiety since then were on holiday and after drinking. Hangovers were always the worst. But otherwise I was doing well. I have two degrees and held jobs ever since i was 16 doing new things, meeting new people, new situations every day.

That was until the end of last year. I finally 'cracked' in Novemeber and it really peaked over christmas with really bad panic attacks and physical depletion. Thing is it was actually never that bad the first 4 years I had it originally.

I seem to have a greater fear of the anxious symptoms and panic this time. I also have no safety net anymore, and this is the scariest thing. I no longer get the reassurance and comfort I had before from being at home, in my bed, or even from going to the doctor or hospital. I have the intense fear that when I get anxious or panic I have no place to go. It leaves me so restless and the fear-on-fear cycle builds.

I had every confidence that I would overcome it again but that confidence has waned. I fear everything. Even going in to hospital. I woke up last night early in the morning and had a panic attack. I just cant seem to control like I could before.

I guess I am looking for a little reassurance. I have diazepam but i'm afraid to take that when i am anxious! I did last night and it helped but now I am sitting at home with this low level constant state of anxiety. I just want it to go away. I don't know how I can go on if this doesn't subside.

Any help or input at all would be helpful. Let me know sincerely and honestly that I can overcome this!

I guess I have the irrational fear that I am different from everyone else. That my case is unique or that I am an incurable case. Sorry for the long winded post.