I'm scared stress is damaging my health.

I can't cope.

The stress is affecting my basic day to day living and nobody gives a **** (the people around me). I want to scream. I want to cry. I want to run into the wall, or punch it. I feel like I'm one step away from exploding.

My head is full of rage. I can't even have a simple conversation with somebody without feeling abnormal anger.

The ex comes around to walk the dogs, and have food. And when she's here I've noticed my stress levels sky rocket. I don't know why. I feel bad for feeling that way. I try my hardest not to feel like this. But I do. And I know she can sense it.

My uncle came yesterday, and today, and I wanted to scream at him to go away. I ended up in the bathroom clutching my head trying to breath. He was talking nonsense about conspiracy stuff and I just wanted him to go. I can't be ****''ed with what is going on in the world when I've no own stress and problems to worry about.

I've never felt like this before. And I have thoughts of not wanting to live. It's a different kind of thought. Like I'm tired of all this and I see no escape. It's a struggle to live at the moment and nobody cares about how I feel.

It's my birthday today, but I'm just lay on my air bed feeling awful, plagued with stress. It's a horrible day. And I can't look forward to tomorrow because it's going to be the same problems. I have no light at the end of the tunnel.

I feel sick, and my anxiety will not let up.

I just want to be on my own, and I want people to leave me alone. Then I will be happy. Is that too much to ask for?