Hello lovely people. I’m new here and I guess I just need a hand hold today. I’ve had some pelvic discomfort the past few weeks and I have a colonoscopy scheduled tomorrow.

In short, the discomfort is on the left side mainly and radiates to my back. It’s not pain, just really an uncomfortable feeling, almost like mild menstrual cramps. I also feel the urge for to have a bowel movement, but if I go only a bit comes out if anything at all and it’s usually quite watery and soft. I FEEL constipated - there is that feeling of fullness - but if I go it’s quite soft or diarrhoea. It all began a few weeks out of nowhere. Prior to that I was pretty regular with normal bowel movements.

Yesterday I took a laxative and had a very satisfying BM (sorry for TMI) - well shaped and normalising - followed by another that was essentially brown water.

I have celiac disease so always conscious of my abdominal and stomach comfort. The only stomach issues I’ve had is a few years ago two instances of not being able to control my bowels - it was odd and never happened again so I never mentioned it to anyone.

This morning I had a small loose BM with some mucusy pink blood in it. I’m now here crying and drafting goodbye messages to my two little boys in my head, which just intensifies my anxiety and sends me spiralling into a panic attack while googling “how to tell small children their mother is dying”.

I don’t really know what I’m here for. I’m just so scared that I’ve got bowel cancer or some other abdominal or pelvic cancer and I’m not sure how to get through the next twenty hours.