inner voice please help

[DOM1234]

Im really struggaling today my anxiety has been the worst ever over christmas and i feel on the verge of a breakdown. im so scared that im developing phycosis. its like my mind has now convinced itself of it and is playing really nasty tricks on me.past few days ive had so much mind chatter its like im talking too myself in my head all the time about everything even i think ill go and get something too eat now and i say it in my head its in my voice but it feels really loud and its really freaking me out. i was in town ealier and somebody looked at me and my internal voice said whats he looking at this scared me because i wouldnt even think that i dont really care what he was looking at. ive tryed diverting my attention today but i keep imaganing noises like bangs in my head and my attention goes back too my thoughts. im so tired and stressed at the minute but cant sleep for long also i suffer really bad with derealization and my thoughts feel extra loud and like i have no control over them like there seperate from me. id just like too say im not delusional or paranoid i dont think the cia is messing with my mind at all just so scared of cracking up.also i feel a lot of pressure inside my head like its goin too explode and my ears are really sensative even typing this is hurting my ears. i know the voice is my inner voice but it feels louder is this just deralization and serious stress please help thanks

[ann88]

Hi,

I just wanted to let you know that so many people with anxiety and/or panic will have had thoughts of "I think I'm going crazy" at some point. Believe me, it's more normal than you think. Your mind is running away with you and magnifying things to be worse than they really are. I think people who have some kind of psychosis arent really aware of their thoughts the way you are describing (if that makes sense). Honestly, anxiety will not cause you any harm, other than feeling rubbish for a while. Christmas takes it out of you, and it's easy to feel like everything's getting on top of you. I suffer with panic attacks and am jealous that you can say you were in town earlier! I would love to go into town shopping like I used to but just the thought scares me. I've also been feeling particularly bad the last couple of days, and I have put it down to Christmas and feeling as though another year has passed me by and here I am still struggling with anxiety and panic. Just remember that ANXIETY WILL NOT CAUSE YOU TO GO MAD. Lack of sleep and lots of stress is making you feel bad, but just try to put some time aside for yourself, watch some telly, eat well, do whatever you do to relax, and just look after yourself. Maybe do some exercise - they do say that helps!

If you haven't already read it (a lot of people on here have!) I would recommend a book called Self Help for Your Nerves by Dr. Claire Weekes. I think it would really help you.

I'm sure you'll start feeling better soon. :)

[feelingbad]

Hi Dom1234
I know exactly where you're coming from. I thought Xmas Day that I was going to have to go to A&E as my anxiety and panic attacks were out of control and all I wanted to do was to stop my constant inward thinking. I would give anything to be back the way I was a week or so ago but have to accept that at the moment I am having a bad time but that it will go again, like it always does. I spend my days with my head constantly thinking thinking so that I am totally absorbed in my own little world, which again sends me panicking. Since the 1990's I have kept a book so when I felt at the end of my tether before I wrote down all my thoughts and when I have a bad attack I go back to what I had written before and it re-enforces that yes I was bad before but I did get better. I read through the book today and found it quite amusing that all my worries, inward thinking and feelings of unreality were all exactly what I experienced in years gone by. And yes I am still as scared of them today as I was then - but I have to remember that I got well before and I will again!!

[harasgenster]

Hi. The inner voice seeming too loud still classes as hallucination. Things seeming too small, too large, too quiet or too loud are all hallucinations of a kind.

This is severe stress and lack of sleep and nothing more. Like the posters above me said, if you had psychosis you would not have this self awareness and you would be delusional.

What's going on in your life right now? Have you got a lot on? I find that the problems you describe affect me when I'm snowed under. Take some time off. Do whatever you can to get some rest and if you haven't already, get thee to a doctor and explain the thoughts. If you're not sleeping well, let him know, as insomnia can wreak all sorts of havoc and the hallucinations that can stem from it are not pleasant.

Don't worry about these symptoms too much, they are not unusual and do not portend of serious mental illness. It's just a sign you're under too much strain.

[DOM1234]

Thankyou too all that replied I can't belive I'm actually hallucinating that's my worst fear. My life is full of stress my fiancé left with my son and lives with another man I lost my job thru depression and I'm on my own most of the time because I'm scared of going mad and loseing my son even more than I have. I thought my inner voice had become loud because my mind doesn't feel connected too my body part of depersnalization. I was praying somebody would say they have an inner voice too

[ann88]

Don't worry about that hallucination thing - at the end of the day it is what it is and giving it a label of 'hallucinations' doesn't help. I don't think you are experiencing hallucinations at all so try to forget that comment. I am forever talking to myself and quite often think 'is this normal?' I mean, I actually have conversations with myself, and imagine that there is someone there with me engaging in conversation! What you are experiencing is definitely related to the depersonalisation/derealisation symptom that thousands of people experience, particularly during times of stress. it sounds like you are going through a tough time at the moment and this 'inner voice' that you are hearing is simply adding to your worries. The most important thing to remember: YOU WILL NOT COME TO ANY HARM. Maybe you could make an appointment with your GP to have a chat and see if there is anything they can do to help. Try to have a chat with a close friend or family member and get some things off your chest. Don't feel like you need to struggle through alone. :)

[ChrisK]

THANK YOU, your post was such a relief for me. I have this mind chatter problem as well, I can't sleep because of it but distraction was a wonder today, I busied myself for the entire day,good breakfast, exercise, shower, kitchen-help..etc I think I'm ready to go to bed now.

[harasgenster]

Thankyou too all that replied I can't belive I'm actually hallucinating that's my worst fear.

Hi, sorry. I didn't mean to scare you like that. I suppose I used the words that would have calmed me down but everything is subjective, I didn't really think. :) I didn't mean it in a psychotic/schizophrenic way. Hallucination just means an exaggerated experience of something. Like when you've been travelling for a while and afterwards you sort of feel like you're on a boat - that's a hallucination. It's a very normal bodily reaction and absolutely nothing to be scared of. The poster above me is right, it might not be helpful to use the word hallucination as it has a sort of connection to mental illness. What you're experiencing just sounds to me like a heightened sense of something everybody feels. And if it makes you feel any better, when I was younger I'd feel a bit spaced and weird and the things in my head would sound really loud and echoey (including my inner voice) and the things outside would sound really quiet and far away. I even heard other voices apart from my own! But I only suffer from anxiety, nothing else, and so far I haven't lost my mind! Anxiety can do some scary things but it can't hurt you.

Sorry again if I scared you, I really should have put it a different way. :)

EDIT: As you said you'd like to hear of others suffering in the way you are. I've just remembered something else that might help. I knew someone else that suffered from anxiety. She was under a huge amount of stress in her life at the time. She said she not only heard her voice really loud in her head but she heard all of these other things going on in there - she said it was like the radio was on quietly inside her head and there were all these voices talking. Both me and her got checked out by the doctor when this was happening and he didn't bat an eyelid so we didn't worry.

I hope everything starts to get better for you :)

[DOM1234]

Thankyou so much too everyone for your replies im so worried about all this. things havent been going well for the past few years everything in my life has fallen apart but i also have good things happaning at the moment and i want too be able too enjoy them for once without thinking im going crazy. thankyou again

[Wildmage]

Also another book, which I found helpful was one called "at last a life" by Paul David - try Amazon.

This basically goes into loads of information about anxiety and panic etc and when I was really bad and even now when I start to think too much, I read bits of this and it helps to calm me down. Same as talking to people on this forum, it helps to know we are not on our own with this.

I get some good days, but also some bad days still and today is a bad day, which may be caused by the fact I did not sleep well last night and am tired and have a stressful job, which is getting to me lately.

I am also taking Rescue Remedy, which is a herbal remedy and takes the edge off the anxiety. This might be worth trying also listen to relaxation CD's before going to bed, I do and it helps distract your mind from all the "what if and oh my god" type thoughts

Emma (aka) wildmage