Stuckman
02-08-17, 16:56
Hi, I know its long but hope someone can help.
I'm at a point where I am struggling coping with low self-esteem worse than any other time. I'm a adult but still feel like a little kid and I struggle to be independent, because of all my anxiety. Now there is several reasons for this. Most of my general anxiety and social anxiety is probably strong because I have a diagnosis of Aspergers Syndrome (but very mildly). Things most people don't think twice about don't always come naturally to me
I recently finished a University course, and it was at University where everything plummeted for me and I learnt the extent of my problems.
In my last year, I decided to try and stick out living away from home (I tried this in the first year but was overwhelmed and left and lived with parents second year)
I enjoyed it at first, but I soon realised how different and strange I felt to other people my age. I was overwhelmed by fending for myself. The people I lived with were nice, but they had life outside the house I noticed unlike me. All I was doing was sitting in my room on the Internet and I didn't have a social life as I wasn't close with anyone on my course.
I struggled to feed and cook for myself and keep healthy, so my health deteriorated both mentally and physically and having to go to A & E away from home was what did it for me. I couldn't afford to do anything other than pay rent anyway.
After 6 months (I could've stayed there for the whole year) I decided it was too much for me.. again. :mad:
Ever since I've always been questioning myself and feeling terrible. I keep thinking about the people I lived with and memories of the experience. They were positive memories mostly but they feel painful for some reason. I became very sensitive living with strangers towards the last month or so and became paranoid.
I just keep thinking about that I tried to live away twice and try and be an independent adult, but ended badly. I live with my parents at the moment but I'm very isolated.
I wonder if anyone can relate to my experience or offer any advice for me to get past this, and stop dwelling on these memories. I'd be very grateful because it feels like it's destroying my self esteem.
Thanks :)
I'm at a point where I am struggling coping with low self-esteem worse than any other time. I'm a adult but still feel like a little kid and I struggle to be independent, because of all my anxiety. Now there is several reasons for this. Most of my general anxiety and social anxiety is probably strong because I have a diagnosis of Aspergers Syndrome (but very mildly). Things most people don't think twice about don't always come naturally to me
I recently finished a University course, and it was at University where everything plummeted for me and I learnt the extent of my problems.
In my last year, I decided to try and stick out living away from home (I tried this in the first year but was overwhelmed and left and lived with parents second year)
I enjoyed it at first, but I soon realised how different and strange I felt to other people my age. I was overwhelmed by fending for myself. The people I lived with were nice, but they had life outside the house I noticed unlike me. All I was doing was sitting in my room on the Internet and I didn't have a social life as I wasn't close with anyone on my course.
I struggled to feed and cook for myself and keep healthy, so my health deteriorated both mentally and physically and having to go to A & E away from home was what did it for me. I couldn't afford to do anything other than pay rent anyway.
After 6 months (I could've stayed there for the whole year) I decided it was too much for me.. again. :mad:
Ever since I've always been questioning myself and feeling terrible. I keep thinking about the people I lived with and memories of the experience. They were positive memories mostly but they feel painful for some reason. I became very sensitive living with strangers towards the last month or so and became paranoid.
I just keep thinking about that I tried to live away twice and try and be an independent adult, but ended badly. I live with my parents at the moment but I'm very isolated.
I wonder if anyone can relate to my experience or offer any advice for me to get past this, and stop dwelling on these memories. I'd be very grateful because it feels like it's destroying my self esteem.
Thanks :)