Anxiety at work is destroying my life

[Faith1992]

Hey guys,

First of all thanks for reading.

I moved to a new town in Feb this year and since then I am now on my third job.

I'm starting to become deeply embarrassed/ashamed about my constant job hopping, I've done it all my life. I think some of it is down to bad luck as in the firms I've gone to haven't been good companies to work for but I think a lot of it is me. I've always been extremely anxious in a workplace setting.

Since 17 (I'm 27 now) I've always worked in an office doing various things but mostly buying, admin and customer service etc. It's always been in the manufacturing sector and I've just left yet another job after been there only two months, because I felt overloaded and bombarded with work even though I was only still learning the role plus the directors were horrid shouting/swearing at staff etc.

My anxiety has always been in the workplace NEVER outside of work but this week I had a meltdown at the doctor and told her that I wasn't coping. I've managed to find another job to begin in the new year but it's the same type I've always done and I hold no hope of it being any different to be honest. The doctor signed me off sick until I start me new job and told me not to go back to the old one.

My mum thinks the type of job I do and sector i work in is too pressured and fast paced for me and I need to rethink what I need to do as a job otherwise I'll just carry on going round in circles.

Has anyone got any ideas of what is a good job for someone with anxiety? I'm not going to lie I am sick to death of office work. I would prefer to be on my feet. My mum suggested waitressing, I did this while I was at school and when I think back to all the many jobs I've had, I did actually enjoy this and wasn't anxious constantly.

Only problem is it's not enough money for me. We are supposed to be buying a house next year maybe I could do the office job and gain a food industry qualification with a view to (once the house is bought) looking into going to a job role that actually suits me. Because my constant job hopping is making me anxious, hopeless and it's very stressful as I'm always "the new person" and having to learn a new role is so tiring.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? Any advice at all is really appreciated, I feel like such a loser right now.

[randomforeigner]

Your mum is probably right, things are much more fast-paced nowadays. It was just as well you got out after no more than two months... Use the time until your next job to think over what options are available, what you like, what you can't stand, if you need more training and if so what and where and how. Anyway three jobs isn't "job-hopping"... and now you've got the knack of how to quickly get the ropes at a new place so things will go much easier the next time, that's what I think anyway.

[Faith1992]

Thank you randomforeigner,

Unfortunately I am a job hopper. I've been in full time work now for ten years and the longest job I have had was only 2 years and so all the others, I've basically had a new job every year so I would consider that hopping and now recruiters start to question my CV and I up and leave companies so fast and I'm too embarrassed to say it's over crippling anxiety.

I will definitely use my time off to figure out a better path for me. I will have to see what my new job is like. It's more money so no doubt it's going to be stressful.

I'm just sick of being overloaded with work and being set up to fail by managers. I just want a job where I can see the work that needs to be done and do it. That's why I think maybe waitressing will suit me. In the last few jobs I've had I've felt obliged to stay back unpaid just to get the work done which has effected my home life because I'm just that stressed/tired when I get home I just want to sleep.

[Fishmanpa]

Faith,

It's not a matter of what job is good for someone with anxiety as much as it's about doing something you enjoy doing. Read the quote in my signature. Enjoying the work you do is half the battle. Even if you get stressed occasionally, the fact you're doing what you're passionate about makes up for it.

What are you passionate about? What do YOU want to do. I would explore that and see where it takes you.

Positive thoughts

[Faith1992]

Thanks for your reply Fishmanpa,

The problem is I find that simply "doing what you love" is often unrealistic. For example I love to write creatively. I would love to be a novelist but the chances of getting successfully published are slim. But I would love to do that, stay at home and write but that does not mean that I'd want to be a journalist or an editor or anything like that, other than that I generally enjoy like, I'm outdoorsy and into watersports, love animals and nature.

I've never ever known what I want to do as a job and I know that no job is a walk in the park and some stress is good for you but the levels of anxiety I suffer (for example panic attacks while sat in the car park) is just not normal and it's all down to work. If I can get rid of all that I would enjoy life a lot more.

Don't get me wrong I do actually like working (when the job is going ok) I absolutely HATE being stuck at home.

[Fishmanpa]

What's stopping you from writing in the meantime? Publishing yourself on-line etc?

I'm a musician. Is that any more unrealistic? I studied music, toured and played professionally full time for 15 years. I "retired" from performance for 15 years and worked (still do) in the music industry (CD/DVD manufacturing/sales/marketing etc.) and started performing again part time. Music is my passion and I make a living at it.

Thing is, I had to start somewhere and at the beginning, there wasn't much $$$ involved. Creativity, like anything else, is still a business. Your product is your creativity as opposed to a physical thing per se'.

So, if working in your current situation is paying the bills then it makes sense to keep at it while you're pursuing your passion.

If you like outdoorsy things, what about looking into being a Park Ranger or work with a wildlife shelter or as a veterinary assistant?

Look, I could have gotten a degree in law or some other thing and made a ton more money in my life but I'm happy doing what I do and that's worth more than the things money can buy.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

Positive thoughts

[randomforeigner]

I read tonight that IKEA staff gets around £1267 + a monthly salary in bonus, each. As a Swede I've of course visited IKEA more times than I care to remember, and I've always felt it to be a friendly place with great staff, especially if you need to get assistance to choose e.g. kitchen furniture. Maybe this is something you could look into? If you'd like to have a managerial role in the future, I believe they do internal recruiting. Don't think the staff seem overly stressed out either. You could always check it out, if for no other reason then just to get a picture of what it could be like at other workplaces than the one you've just left. Definitely no "directors being horrid shouting/swearing at staff etc" - as a matter of fact I've never ever had any manager swear and curse.

[Faith1992]

Fishmanpa,

Yes I do write in my spare time. Here in the U.K. It's extremely expensive to retrain and study, I wouldn't be able to do that and keep a roof over my head. It's so cool you're a musician! I cannot sing at all! Although I did play clarinet at school.

Randomforeigner,

I would love to work at IKEA! Although the closest one to me is 2hrs drive away.

I need a job I can just go into without having to train. This is why I thought waitressing. I'm quite good with people and very caring. I just struggle with the corporate life in the office it's so high pressured, you don't even get treated like a human. And managers/directors swearing has become the norm for me. The last two jobs both directors did this. The job I just left, the director called all of the warehouse staff "****ing imbeciles" in front of the open office to which all (except for me) had a good laugh about. That's the whole of the warehouse staff not just one person, he just undermined about 1/3 of his workforce in one sentence! It's just craziness!

[randomforeigner]

Well, as I said. Think it over, make plans. You can let your plan have several steps. I don't know where you live but maybe in the future you plan to live somewhere else, then that's an issue, or if you're very fond of your home town, that's another factor to consider. Only you know the answers...