OCD rituals and compulsions
Good afternoon all
I have suffered with OCD in a variety of forms since I was around 14. It started of with the typical checking doors/lights were off to remembering specific things that were said to general obsessing over a variety of areas. To unwind I love to play the game football manager but OCD has managed to get it self embedded in here so badly that one of my key hobbies is no longer enjoyable in the same way it once was. I was just wondering if anyone has experienced similar or had any advice? Any imput very gratefully recieved.
There are a number of areas the OCD has managed to infiltrate and have an impact including:
1) Loading a new game requires a huge amount of checking to make sure all the little details are accurate - I also take photos of each screen to make sure and refer back to. If it is not loaded correclty or a button is clicked in the wrong way I have to stop and restart the process all over again. This can possibly last for hours - and has gone on for days.
2) I cannot load a game with a team where the number 13 is invloved in any format - ie they finished 13th last year/13000 season ticket holders/13 years since a trophy as this would be bad lukc and could lead to some form of unspecified doom outside of the game.
3) Choosing a team to manage is an almost imposible task as the OCD links some form of bad luck or possible catastrophy to nearly any reason it so chooses - could be negative things that have happened managing that team outside of the game in the past/the sponsor of that team being linked to something that could be negative - ie finance linked to bankruptcy and that is an omen for me - or if the sponsor is a broadband company this is negative and I worked for one and had a bad experience and this could be triggered with my current role.
I am off work this week using some annual leave and had wanted to start an new game but the OCD will not let me and feels like such a wasted day. Today is the anniversary of one of my wifes friends passing away and the OCD wont let m eload it today as it would always be the game that was loaded on the anniversary of her best friend passing.
Thank you so much to anyone who made it to the end of my rambling and any imput very happily recieved.
Take care all, Luke
Re: OCD rituals and compulsions
Just wondering whether you have tested your personality Ennegram? I am an Ennegram 6, and 6's are pretty obsessive with worrying about threats in their physical environment.
Re: OCD rituals and compulsions
Hello.
I want to start out by saying that I very much relate to your situation. Primarily during the COVID lockdown, I was bound by OCD and had to resort to rituals to keep myself reassured and less anxious. I avoided doing things on certain days, performed a ritual every time I went in my bedroom, opened up a new tab in Chrome, booting up a video game, starting a movie, yada yada, you get the idea. To put it short, it made my life a living hell.
However, if there's one thing that me and a lot of people have learned on here is that avoidance is like a drug. It may provide temporary relief but once the effects wear off, our OCD remains not only just as bad pre-avoidance but sometimes even worse. And, while I still have moments of my OCD kicking in and trying to prevent me from doing certain things, its nowhere near as bad as it once was because living my life to the fullest is whats most important to me and I no longer let my OCD interfere with that. I can now click on a YouTube video or leave my bedroom without performing one ritual!
The key is not to try and fight the OCD. Its to let it do its thing and ignore it afterwards. Easier said than done I know, but it CAN be done. The next time you play your game, try to avoid doing rituals or cut them down significantly. Say to yourself "Okay, so the number 13 showed up here, that seems scary but I can't just go back and try and fix it. I will deal with it". Good luck and I hope you get better!
Re: OCD rituals and compulsions
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Ldavidc
Good afternoon all
I have suffered with OCD in a variety of forms since I was around 14. It started of with the typical checking doors/lights were off to remembering specific things that were said to general obsessing over a variety of areas. To unwind I love to play the game football manager but OCD has managed to get it self embedded in here so badly that one of my key hobbies is no longer enjoyable in the same way it once was. I was just wondering if anyone has experienced similar or had any advice? Any imput very gratefully recieved.
There are a number of areas the OCD has managed to infiltrate and have an impact including:
1) Loading a new game requires a huge amount of checking to make sure all the little details are accurate - I also take photos of each screen to make sure and refer back to. If it is not loaded correclty or a button is clicked in the wrong way I have to stop and restart the process all over again. This can possibly last for hours - and has gone on for days.
2) I cannot load a game with a team where the number 13 is invloved in any format - ie they finished 13th last year/13000 season ticket holders/13 years since a trophy as this would be bad lukc and could lead to some form of unspecified doom outside of the game.
3) Choosing a team to manage is an almost imposible task as the OCD links some form of bad luck or possible catastrophy to nearly any reason it so chooses - could be negative things that have happened managing that team outside of the game in the past/the sponsor of that team being linked to something that could be negative - ie finance linked to bankruptcy and that is an omen for me - or if the sponsor is a broadband company this is negative and I worked for one and had a bad experience and this could be triggered with my current role.
I am off work this week using some annual leave and had wanted to start an new game but the OCD will not let me and feels like such a wasted day. Today is the anniversary of one of my wifes friends passing away and the OCD wont let m eload it today as it would always be the game that was loaded on the anniversary of her best friend passing.
Thank you so much to anyone who made it to the end of my rambling and any imput very happily recieved.
Take care all, Luke
That certainly rings some bells with me too. When I was 14 I developed severe emetophobia out of the blue despite not actually vomiting since about 3 years prior to 12th August 1991, the date of my first major emetophobic attack.
I've been obsessing myself silly over various other things over recent weeks such as people smoking in situations where they shouldn't be and people being let off scot-free for breaking rules/laws generally. Plus I keep ruminating on the dreadful situation on Rhodes Island where travel companies allegedly ignored the warnings about extreme temperatures and the risks of wildfires which smacks of outright negligence and have indeed been putting profits first before customers' safety and security.
Kind of reminiscent of all the total chaos that went on to ensue when early in the Covid pandemic, when the travel companies, the authorities and even many individuals themselves were 'caught napping'!
